i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
