god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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