Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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