The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
You smell like stripper and shame
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize