ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I supernannyed him into submission
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
