Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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