Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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