I got chris browned last night
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize