that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
