Porn is love you can see.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
