the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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