You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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