I want to stick my p in your. b.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
