why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
