need another drink. this is the easiest way
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
