It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
