I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
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