haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
