You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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