whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize