I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
