I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
