I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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