Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
