woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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