You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize