Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
People in love make me want to vomit
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
