I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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