I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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