Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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