Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
