so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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