he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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