Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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