I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
