just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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