i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
