How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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