Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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