Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
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