can we get nightvision for the apartment?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
