do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
