before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
