Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
And then my night got REAL pukey
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
