It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
