Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
