Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
