Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
