i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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