You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Randomize
