she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
